DAY ONE (16/02/09)
When I first joined Second Life I began by creating my avatar character. I named my avatar “Tealeaf Seoung” as I knew from the beginning that I wanted to create a fantasy kind of character where I could project my interests of fantasy, fairies, and festival dress. I changed and altered aspects of my appearance choosing face and body shape, skin, eyes, hair…making my character with a slim and tall body shape.
I chose the name because I love tea and nature and drinking tea in the nature, and I thought it would suit the character that I had in mind! I chose the weirdest newbie skin and entered orientation island where I played around with the controls and got used to the interface and the second life world. Practising flying, taking photos and exploring.
At first it was weird getting used to the controls and Second Life was slow and jumpy which put me off and made me loose my patience a bit. It made me wonder why people used Second Life so much if it was so slow and hard to use – so many registered users must just abandon their avatars after registering for free to try it out.
Following this experience I tried using the University Internet connection and Second Life ran fine which eased my frustration. I discovered that many other countries actually have better broadband connections than here in the UK – so most users probably don’t have problems running it. Though some people are still avoidingVRs because of these setbacks – people are unpatent, and don’t have the time – they expect the best. When VRs become more advanced in the future, perhaps more and more people will enjoy and find them even more exciting.
DAY TWO (12/03/09)
Now the connection was better, I entered back into Second Life with the mission to change my appearance. The most important thing is Second Life appears to be the way you look, and the freedom to experiment with how you represent yourself. I even felt a bit embarrassed in my newbie skin. I started to notice the divide between the newbie’s and the experienced residents and wondered how to progress socially if it was so hard to make friends. I decided to teleport myself to some different shops where I browsed around all kinds of free clothing, hair, eyes, accessories, underwear and shoes. I didn’t want to spend any money, but I had already seen avatars that looked amazing, everyone in second life was beautiful in their own way. In the end I found a green fairy like dress and some psychedelic flairs, which I was happy with. I also changed my hair to green, in a longer style. It was quite like shopping in the real world, choosing clothes that appealed to you to express yourself and your tastes to others. I did feel my avatar was a kind of representation and extension of my own self, as it was how I chose to present myself in that environment. I created a character that didn’t look like myself but reflected my interests… I began to think of what image I would create if I had more money, time and skill.
After spending a long time getting my appearance right I felt ready to go off into the world and explore, and I also noticed I felt quite proud of the look id achieved. My intentions were to create a character that was weird and appealing to me that I wouldn’t be able to achieve in the normal life – I began thinking of what image I would create if I have more money, time and skill in second life – id be a hippy fairy with wings, dreaded hair, colourful and long elf like clothes and I would explore pretty lands and places. More experienced residents would probably have paid money to achieve their ideal look. This is funny as it turns out there are still pressures to look good in the Virtual world – however they are so easy to overcome. The control and the freedom is there so be who you want to be, but only if you are willing to pay for it, or gain the skills to make the clothes yourself. Following this I craved something more exciting, and began to search for places to explore. I didn’t expect to enjoy playing Second Life at all, but in fact I was surprised how the freedom to explore anywhere under your own steam, with no rules, was quite appealing. I began searching and visiting many places that appealed to my RL interests, and I discovered that I enjoyed to just explore imaginative landscapes that people had created.
Firstly I went to a medieval shopping area, where my avatar daydreamed in some flowers. After this I found a broomstick and teleported to a Gypsie island called ‘House of the Red Witch’. There were rivers and bridges, butterflies, birds and flowers. I sat by the fire and played some drums, I relaxed in a Gypsie caravan and then danced under a rainbow surrounded by butterflies, overlooking the open sea.The novelty of the world was exciting, knowing that anything completely random could be around the corner! After this I discovered a mermaid temple, and found out I was right about people perfecting their image. I found out some people have avatar mermaids, where they buy and tail and animation overrides and learn to swim around as a mermaid. Here I met my first friend, Kei Kawanishi, a beautiful mermaid lying on a rock reading a book. I approached her, thinking she may ignore me, but found she was really friendly. We chatted for ages, mainly about the appearance of our avatars and how cool Second Life was in trying out new things you couldn’t do in RL.I decided to approach Kei in a friendly and innocent manner, and I noticed how much I was manipulating my performance towards her. I chatted to her in an excited manner, asking enthusiastic questions and saying how much I enjoyed SL to provoke a reaction about her experiences. I didn’t want her to realise I was researching, to avoid distancing her from myself, and my method worked nicely. She offered advice, and told me a bit about herself, also adding me as a friend, suggesting I meet her again, and offering her help if I needed it. She told me how she started by making her avatar look like her real life self, then changes a couple of aspects like her hair and mermaid tail as these were things she really liked or wanted to have. (Also see Appendix B.)
It was fun talking to her, and I realised that after a while the exploration may get boring unless I make friends and become a part of community groups and activities. Kei warned me that not all residents were nice, just like in the RL, which suggested all residents are aware that people do experiment with identity. Kei could be from any country, culture, class, race, background, but in Second Life it doesn’t matter, because all our differences are replaced with common likenesses and interests with the barriers gone, and because of this it is easy to approach anyone.
After logging off SL, the activities of the day popped into my head a few times. I thought about people who spend a few hours or more online a day, and make good friends with people – having fun, and getting to know new people. It made me realised how easy it is for the Virtual life and the real life to cross over, just in the users thoughts.
DAY THREE (13/03/09)
On my third visit to SL, I searched and explored many beautiful places, including a glowing island where I ventured into an underwater cave, played a harp and sat by a fire on the beach, and found some alice in wonderland style sculptures. Kei had told me how I could become whatever I dreamed of being, and encouraged me to find the fairy wings that I wanted. After some searching online, I found a rare pair of rainbow wings that were free! My avatar now felt more complete! With my appearance as I wanted, I visited even more random places: a secret garden where I explored and swung on a swing, Heaven where I swung on the moon! I also visited the realms of Middle Earth and the castle of Hogwarts, from fantasy books and films Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, but unfortunately found the virtual versions pretty boring. I then visited Space where all the objects were floating around and there was a dance floor with loads of strangely dressed avatars where dancing in a slow and floaty motion!!
DAY FOUR (15/03/09)
Today my aim was to meet more people, firstly I went to a weird trance dance club where there were loads of people dancing together in unusual ways and wearing trance clothes. I loved the club but did actually feel a bit uncomfortable there!! So I moved on to play some sports. Firstly I discovered you could go skiing in Second Life and that made me think how in the future ski clubs and resorts could build their own versions in Second Life and this could attract more customers and be a big way to advertise their resorts. Second Life could definitely be a way for businesses to advertise and grow in the future.
I teleported to a place called the weather channel, but decided to go surfing instead of skiing as I have always wanted to surf and have imagined living in a beach and surf community when I was younger. The beach was really nice, and there were mermaids dancing and splashing in the water. I felt like I stood out like a newbie and I could tell they were experienced players unlike my last friend. When I tried striking conversation about the surf, they only briefly responded before swimming off. I then asked help from a surfer on the shore and got a surfing lesson, however when I finally realised how to paddle out, a mermaid sat on my board and I gave her a ride around the shore. The waves only came when she jumped off and I lost my board again. I wanted to go somewhere with friendlier people, where I felt at ease talking to strangers. I was starting to feel like even in SL, I was being judged by my looks!
Next I learnt how to dance, I also found out that dance clubs have contests with sums of huge prize money which was interesting. There seems to be a different social scene wherever you went. I went to many different clubs but didn’t enjoy them. There was noone to talk to in the only people there were always busy dancing. I found it quite unsociable. I tried searching for my own music tastes (such as psytrance and drum and bass clubs) but I didn’t find any. As I couldn’t find any of the clubs I liked, I went to a medieval garden with a ballroom but it was formal wear only and I didn’t have any. My last day in Second life wasn’t going well and I began to actually get lonely and wondered where there was a place specifically for newbies to meet each other. I started to notice the divide between the newbie’s and the experienced residents and wondered how to progress socially if it was so hard to make friends!!
After searching around I eventually found a place for newbie’s called Shelter – where the purpose was exactly that. Here I got a reasonably good response – people commenting on my wings and talking back to me. There was a general chat going on – but it felt like a chat room that was hard to get involved with the conversation. I did pick up on some interesting conversations though - one person was saying they preferred SL to MMORPGS as socialising holds the attention better than just game play – which they found they just got bored after a while. eg. “Yes! Its build on imagination” I started chatting to a girl called Patience who has scruffy brown long hair, a cute yellow puffy dress and full arm sleeve tattoos. I actually felt a little jealous of her appearance, she looked ace, and that inspired me to go shopping. I also made friends with an Irish man avatar who was very friendly but had to log off. After this I went to a particle lab to learn how to make particles as I wanted to see if I could build something myself… I ended up just flying in a hot air balloon instead, which Is something I have wanted to do since reading the descriptions in Tim Guests book!! I went to cloud château where there were loads of particles and light to get teleported and thrown around in.
REFLECTION: On reflection of my experiences so far, I really enjoyed the exploration aspect of Second Life greatly, and I could go on for many more hours exploring the depths and diversity of the landscapes. The biggest problem I came across was unfriendly residents, offline and online. I first researched in the forums to see if there was anyone to chat to about my research but was put off by the abusive and unfriendly response. I though it would be better in SL, and it was, however I still didn’t manage to make as many friends as I wanted, or get to know anyone very well, though perhaps the newbie’s need to grow into second life and their own skin further until they make real friends.
I don’t think I would take it up as a hobby, but I do understand why people use SL. After finding out so much about this world, it was enjoyable to actually see and explore it for myself. I enjoyed creating my avatar, and did feel it was a representation and extension of my own self – as it was how I chose to present myself in that environment. I projected some of my interests onto the appearance of the avatar, rather than refining an image of someone I wanted to look like in the real world. However I didn’t like the pretentiousness of the world and the need for money in order to keep up with it. I mainly enjoyed the creativity of the world and imagination, rather than finding friends or creating an image – or dong things like clubbing that I could do in the real world - I enjoyed it in the sense of an explorative game where I could try out things I cant in the real world. From my personal experience I can say it is a fun form of game play to consciously understand and explore new aspects of the self, a way to make people feel better about being themselves, or a space to just have fun and play with it!! I now can see why and how people use it, but I think the only way this will pick up in the future is if technology does greatly improve, and can provide a world to appeal to everyone, where they can all play with their real life friends family and community, alongside meeting new ones.
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drink_the_stars's journal
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